Today was Fast Sunday, and a lady in my ward approached the pulpit and talked about how, as a stay at home mother, she loved her kids more than anything, but felt inadequate. No, she didn't mean inadequate because of the burden of raising children--that'd be nothing new. Her feelings were because she felt like she was doing her best to make her home a temple, but it was an ongoing battle.
It wasn't a long testimony, but to me it just sounded so dejected and sad. Like she felt that she had failed because her home was not the perfect temple of continual peace and brotherly-love. She has four boys under the age of eight!
My question, the one that really stuck out to me beyond anything else I heard during that meeting, was how many of the people who preach about making your house a perpetual bliss of temple-like happiness are empty-nesters?
I just feel horrible for this poor sister who is beating herself up over such a stupid recommendation. Basing your worth off your performance as a mother (especially on your performance in the eyes of other members of your ward) is way too common, and so frustrating. I'm all for having the spirit in your house, and having God in your heart. But seriously, if you have four children under eight, expect to have a loud house full of fun, mischief, teasing, trouble, and who knows what else! They're kids. Well-behaved robots would keep the peace better, but we're commanded to raise kids, give yourself a break!
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